# 以德报怨

yǐ dé bào yuàn

Respond to hostility with kindness

## Meaning & wording

**Literally:** Repay resentment with virtue

**Traditional Chinese:** 以德報怨

**Register:** Positive · literary

[People & connection](https://chinese-idioms.yudis.dev/idioms/topics/relationships)

## When to use it

Describe a generous response to someone who caused harm.

Kindness need not mean abandoning boundaries or safety.

## Understanding the expression

The response reverses the expected cycle of an unkind remark followed by another. A person offers help or goodwill despite earlier hostility. The expression praises generosity and restraint, especially when the choice reduces conflict. It does not require accepting repeated unkindness. A thoughtful act can coexist with clear limits. The sentence should show both the previous grievance and the new kindness so the deliberate moral contrast is visible.

## Examples

他曾刁难她，她却以德报怨帮他解困。

### Traditional Chinese

他曾刁難她，她卻以德報怨幫他解困。

tā céng diāo nàn tā ， tā què yǐ dé bào yuàn bāng tā jiě kùn 。

She helped him despite his earlier hostility.

邻居道歉后，她以德报怨送去饭菜。

### Traditional Chinese

鄰居道歉後，她以德報怨送去飯菜。

lín jū dào qiàn hòu ， tā yǐ dé bào yuàn sòng qù fàn cài 。

After the apology, she responded kindly with food.

故事赞美主人公以德报怨。

### Traditional Chinese

故事讚美主人公以德報怨。

gù shì zàn měi zhǔ rén gōng yǐ dé bào yuàn 。

The story praises the protagonist's kindness toward an enemy.

以德报怨也可以保留必要的界限。

### Traditional Chinese

以德報怨也可以保留必要的界限。

yǐ dé bào yuàn yě kě yǐ bǎo liú bì yào de jiè xiàn 。

Kindness after harm can still include necessary boundaries.

## Sources & reference checks

Original explanations and examples from Chinese Idioms Almanac. Source-checked October 6, 2026.

- [CC-CEDICT · forms & pronunciation](https://www.mdbg.net/chinese/dictionary?page=worddict&wdqb=%E4%BB%A5%E5%BE%B7%E5%A0%B1%E6%80%A8)

- [Ministry of Education · 成語典](https://dict.idioms.moe.edu.tw/idiomView.jsp?ID=599&webMd=1&la=0)

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