# 虚与委蛇

xū yǔ wēi yí

Deal with someone through feigned civility

## Meaning & wording

**Literally:** Respond with outward accommodation

**Traditional Chinese:** 虛與委蛇

**Register:** Strategic · literary

[People & connection](https://chinese-idioms.yudis.dev/idioms/topics/relationships)

## When to use it

Describe polite cooperation that hides reluctance or disagreement.

Often strategic or insincere; not ordinary tact alone.

## Understanding the expression

The expression describes outwardly going along while inwardly withholding genuine agreement. A person may exchange polite words, delay a response, or appear cooperative to avoid immediate conflict. It often belongs to tense negotiations or encounters with an untrustworthy person. The civility is instrumental rather than wholehearted. It should not be used for every courteous disagreement, because honestly expressing a boundary in a gentle manner does not necessarily involve pretending to cooperate.

## Examples

她与骗子虚与委蛇，等待警方到场。

### Traditional Chinese

她與騙子虛與委蛇，等待警方到場。

tā yǔ piàn zi xū yǔ wēi yí ， děng dài jǐng fāng dào chǎng 。

She pretended to cooperate with the scammer while waiting for police.

他不愿合作，只是虚与委蛇。

### Traditional Chinese

他不願合作，只是虛與委蛇。

tā bú yuàn hé zuò ， zhǐ shì xū yǔ wēi yí 。

He does not want cooperation and is only feigning civility.

谈判中双方虚与委蛇，毫无进展。

### Traditional Chinese

談判中雙方虛與委蛇，毫無進展。

tán pàn zhōng shuāng fāng xū yǔ wēi yí ， háo wú jìn zhǎn 。

Both sides feigned cooperation, and negotiations went nowhere.

她拒绝继续虚与委蛇，明确说不。

### Traditional Chinese

她拒絕繼續虛與委蛇，明確說不。

tā jù jué jì xù xū yǔ wēi yí ， míng què shuō bù 。

She stopped pretending to go along and clearly refused.

## Sources & reference checks

Original explanations and examples from Chinese Idioms Almanac. Source-checked October 6, 2026.

- [CC-CEDICT · forms & pronunciation](https://www.mdbg.net/chinese/dictionary?page=worddict&wdqb=%E8%99%9B%E8%88%87%E5%A7%94%E8%9B%87)

- [Ministry of Education · 成語典](https://dict.idioms.moe.edu.tw/idiomView.jsp?ID=463&webMd=1&la=0)

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