# 相敬如宾

xiāng jìng rú bīn

Maintain mutual courtesy within marriage

## Meaning & wording

**Literally:** Respect each other like honored guests

**Traditional Chinese:** 相敬如賓

**Register:** Warm · literary

[People & connection](https://chinese-idioms.yudis.dev/idioms/topics/relationships)

## When to use it

Praise considerate conduct between spouses.

Courtesy can coexist with warmth and informality.

## Understanding the expression

An honored guest receives careful attention and respectful treatment. Applying that standard to spouses suggests that familiarity should not become an excuse for harshness or neglect. Modern use praises a marriage marked by mutual courtesy, especially over many years. It sounds formal and traditional. The expression need not imply emotional distance. A couple can joke, disagree, and live informally while still showing the consideration that makes respect visible in daily life.

## Examples

他们夫妻相敬如宾。

### Traditional Chinese

他們夫妻相敬如賓。

tā men fū qī xiāng jìng rú bīn 。

The spouses treat each other with mutual respect.

结婚三十年，他们仍相敬如宾。

### Traditional Chinese

結婚三十年，他們仍相敬如賓。

jié hūn sān shí nián ， tā men réng xiāng jìng rú bīn 。

After thirty years of marriage, they remain respectful.

她希望婚后也能相敬如宾。

### Traditional Chinese

她希望婚後也能相敬如賓。

tā xī wàng hūn hòu yě néng xiāng jìng rú bīn 。

She hopes for mutual respect after marriage.

相敬如宾不等于不能开玩笑。

### Traditional Chinese

相敬如賓不等於不能開玩笑。

xiāng jìng rú bīn bù děng yú bù néng kāi wán xiào 。

Mutual marital courtesy does not rule out joking.

## Sources & reference checks

Original explanations and examples from Chinese Idioms Almanac. Source-checked October 6, 2026.

- [CC-CEDICT · forms & pronunciation](https://www.mdbg.net/chinese/dictionary?page=worddict&wdqb=%E7%9B%B8%E6%95%AC%E5%A6%82%E8%B3%93)

- [Ministry of Education · 成語典](https://dict.idioms.moe.edu.tw/idiomView.jsp?ID=216&webMd=1&la=0)

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